Did you ever think you’d resign from work to take care of your children? I’m trying to think back to my early twenties, when motherhood was just a concept and having children was a dream.
Cut to ten years later. My toddler is taking an afternoon nap, snoring happily and probably dreaming of all things “Cars”. I’m at my computer, finishing up writing assignments, jotting down ideas for some other projects, checking back and forth on the baby. I started the work-at-home-Mom arrangement recently. A few months ago, I took a deep breath, resigned from my day job, and jumped into full-time motherhood. It was a scary move but one I do not regret.
There were a lot of questions thrown my way. What if you decide to work again and can’t get back the same position? What will happen to your family’s finances? Won’t you get bored at home? Some discouraged the move to full-time motherhood, while others were more supportive. Looking back, I’m thankful that I encountered both points of view as they helped me make my decision to spend more time with the baby.
I didn’t realize that being a stay-at-home Mom who works freelance would sap my energies more than working full-time did. I take care of the baby during the day, which is a very physical task. Then I work at night or while the baby is napping. I’m still trying to work out a healthier schedule for myself as I learn to manage the tiredness. But you know what? I am immensely happy.
A friend of mine asked me, “I don’t get it. How could you feel more tired yet feel more fulfilled?”
I smiled. It’s all about the baby.
Enjoying a morning sun bath. Waking up together and sharing some giggles before heading down for breakfast. Running around the neighborhood park on a breezy afternoon. Sharing meals together. Watching him enjoy his toddler years. Watching him grow. I am by his side, not wanting to and no longer bound to miss out on the everyday things that make up his milestones.
Did I ever think I’d resign to take care of children? Ten years ago, no. Now, ten years later, motherhood is not just a concept and my little dream is learning how to talk and run while I happily help guide him every step of the way.
Life has a funny way of working out and guiding you to a path that best suits you. This path may be paved with late nights and tiring daytime chases, but it is blissful, hopeful and all kinds of wonderful.
Hi! I'm Toni Tiu,
and I've been blogging at
at Wifely Steps since 2003. This started as a blog to help newly weds adjust to married life. It has evolved into a home and parenting blog. I write about things close to my heart -- good eats, good reads, family, marriage, and the little things that make everyday happy.
Lissa
February 11, 2011 at 6:06 am (13 years ago)Your decision to do freelance and work from home is very personal and I’m sure, a difficult one. I know how much you’ve agonized over it and I’m glad you went with what’s best for you and your family. I really give props to moms who stay at home, whether they’re full time mommy or working from home. I think the most I can probably do is work part time.
You know it’s funny because when Connor was more of a baby, I didn’t really even miss him at work that much. Well, maybe I did but it seems that I miss him more now that he’s a toddler. Maybe because we interact with each other a lot more these days (or it could be hormones too..haha). Anyway, it’s good that you’re always there and experiencing all his “firsts” with him.
Mauie
February 11, 2011 at 1:35 pm (13 years ago)I took the same giant step more than a decade ago and now I’m reaping the benefits of all my personal sacrifices. The pros have always been more than the cons. Hugs to Timmy!
Mauie´s last blog post ..Mommy Moments- Dear Baby
Valerie
February 11, 2011 at 1:54 pm (13 years ago)Oh that makes me want to go wake my baby up and give her some snuggles. So well written!
Trina
February 11, 2011 at 1:58 pm (13 years ago)Good for you and Timmy! I so admire and envy you
The toughest part of each day is when my 3yr old son tells me ‘Mommy don’t go to office!’ each and every morning sigh
Niña
February 11, 2011 at 3:27 pm (13 years ago)Hi Mommy Toni,
I salute you for your big step.
Ive been thinking of resigning as well ever since i went back to work after maternity leave. It so difficult to leave your own kid! But i think we cant handle being one-income family. But the though never leaves me. I cant wait for the day when i have another job which is more convenient for both me and my baby.
Can you give me tips on where and how to get part time work? I
Thanks!
Niña´s last blog post ..Nuvali Sunday
MieVee @ MummysReviews.com
February 12, 2011 at 12:46 am (13 years ago)I can totally relate to your post! My son’s almost 2 years old and i left my work since pregnancy due to relocation to join hubby. Last year, I started my own writing and consulting business, and work when he sleeps. It can be a mad rush cos he’s such a light-sleeper. I love this arrangement since it allows me to homeschool him.
Enjoy yourself and all the best!
MieVee @ MummysReviews.com´s last blog post ..Winners of The Pat-a-Cake Baby Blankets & Wet Bags Giveaways 13 & 14
Mom-Friday
February 12, 2011 at 12:54 am (13 years ago)They say the most critical stage is the first 6 years of their lives, and I also consider myself fortunate to be able to be there during that most important stage…I stopped working exactly 5 yrs & 1 1/2 months ago. Like you, I stay at home and accept freelance projects.
“I didn’t realize that being a stay-at-home Mom who works freelance would sap my energies more than working full-time did. I take care of the baby during the day, which is a very physical task. Then I work at night or while the baby is napping. I’m still trying to work out a healthier schedule for myself as I learn to manage the tiredness. But you know what? I am immensely happy.”
This is very true as many women won’t realize it until they are in this position — and IT IS A Happy place
Mom-Friday´s last blog post ..Family Friday- 5 Critical Needs for Emotionally Healthy Children
Kay
February 12, 2011 at 1:55 am (13 years ago)Wow! You are brave. Unfortunately, I can’t d the same. Best of luck!
Kay´s last blog post ..Momo Cafe
BabyPink
February 13, 2011 at 8:05 pm (13 years ago)It’s good to know you’re happy. Sa kahit anong desisyon, ‘yun naman ang pinakamahalaga, ‘di ba?
BabyPink´s last blog post ..Happy Thoughts
currystrumpet
February 14, 2011 at 2:25 am (13 years ago)Toni, congratulations on making what must have been such an agonizing choice. Since moving to the Netherlands, I found out that something like 60 or 70 percent of Dutch women work part-time. That’s a huge percent no? So look outward into the world and you’ll find it’s not so crazy to make the choice you did, even though it may have seemed that way when you were about to take the plunge. I admire your courage and the love that is obviously behind the action you took. Timmy’s a very fortunate little man. *HUG!*
currystrumpet´s last blog post ..To market- to market
Martine
February 15, 2011 at 11:07 am (13 years ago)Congratulations on becoming a work-at-homie! I made the same leap last July, when I resigned from teaching so that I could raise my son. I telecommute for an Internet marketing firm, and freelance on the side as a blogger and writer. I wrote about my venture into the work-at-home lifestyle here in this blog entry: http://daintymom.blogspot.com/2010/12/congratulate-me-ive-been-work-at-home.html
I agree with Michelle: the first six years of are the most crucial stage of development for our kids. Being a teacher, I understood this well. I figured that if I could teach other kids for their parents, I most certainly could do the same for my baby and should do it for him all the more. (I used to work in a preschool.) It felt right to make the move from office to home, being that I was also exclusively breastfeeding my little one. Even if I lived next door (literally) to the school of my employ, going home during breaks could not compare with staying home all day to care for my growing baby.
Today, my baby is 15 months. He started walking 2 months ago, before Christmas; yes, I was able to teach him to walk! And I’ve been with him every day since he was six months old, when I resigned from the regular job. He’s still breastfed, too, and I plan to keep b-fing him until he’s two or more. It’s been super worth it, albeit more difficult, as you said, since being a WAHM is really a juggling act.
Bravo to you!
Martine´s last blog post ..My Yummy Valentine
rowie
February 15, 2011 at 11:21 pm (13 years ago)rowie´s last blog post ..Questions to ask during the pre-school hunt
Marie
February 17, 2011 at 10:57 pm (13 years ago)Hi Toni!
Welcome to the club
I know time flies so fast no? My baby turned one last month, and now so many milestones to record. Amazing…
Most of the time I am really really thankful that I get to spend all of the little one’s waking hours with me. Pero sometimes I feel guilty and feel I am shortchanging her. Not giving her 100% coz I’m working on the side…. I guess this wont last long anyway.. in a few years even if I wanted to have her by my side during the day hindi na pwede coz she will be attending school.
Let’s enjoy the time and seize the moment
Cheers to us!
Marie
Marie´s last blog post ..My mind is filled with post its
giselle
February 23, 2011 at 3:58 pm (13 years ago)Hi Toni! Welcome to the wonderful, but quite difficult, world of full-time motherhood! Like you, I opted to be a stay-at-home mom so I can take care of our children full-time. Initially, I thought, it would only be for a year or two. But twelve years later, I’m still here at it. I realized that our children’s need for us does not end when they’re toilet-trained or go to school. The needs just change with their age. As babies, they need us to feed them and change their diapers. As toddlers, they need help learning their ABC’s. Even as bigger kids, they still need us to be there for the many different questions they have – about school, friends, relationships. I must admit there are times (like times of financial need) when I ask myself if I made the right decision. But when I look at my children, and see how wonderful they are, I know in my heart that I did. Your family is so blessed that you decided to take this course.
P90X Review
April 20, 2011 at 3:53 pm (13 years ago)Spending time with your kids is the biggest sacrifice a career woman can make. I am a career woman. I am one who needs to be busy, who makes sure I get the money, but now that I am engaged and dreaming of a little one soon, maybe sacrificing my career for my kid would be a good choice. But I’d make that decision when I get there. Right now, wedding planning is keeping me busy and sometimes frustrated
sarah
March 15, 2012 at 3:08 pm (12 years ago)I have been a stay at home mom for more than 12 years and decided to work because my marriage did not work plus I realized that a woman needs to learn to rely on her herself and be self sufficient. Never have I thought that the experiences I had would serve as an inspiration every time I write a post.
Now that I have been working full time for more than six years, I sure wish that I can have the freedom to do what I really want yet still earn enough for me and my kids. I sure wish sleeping regular hours and spending quality time with my kids. I am not going to loose hope because I know I already had started taking the first step.
Thank you for a wonderful post even though it took me a year to visit and comment on it. Feel free to visit my blog and drop a few lines.