Choose Your Battles


As part of our 7th wedding anniversary, and in a way, this blog’s 7th anniversary as well, I’ve invited some of my friends to write about their own wifely steps. This is the fifth in a series of guest posts. Let’s check out Abby’s wifely steps.

In all the five years that my husband and I are married, I remember this one and only fight that made a dent on the wall – and it’s all because of a UFC Mix Martial Arts Show. I was waiting for him to to go to bed, he dozed off on the couch while watching. I got mad. He got mad because I got mad. And the poopie hits the fan, so to speak. Hilarious now, yes. But at that time it felt as if things will fall apart between us. OA, no? You have to admit it’s a catchy headline – “Couple to Separate Because of UFC Show”.

Seriously though, how many times have married couples argue over silly, trivial things? And out of all those petty fights, what good came of it? I thought so. The fact is, sometimes we are so intent on proving ourselves right (or proving our partners wrong) on an issue that’s not even worth arguing about. When all is said and done, all that came out of me complaining about dirty socks not being properly placed in the hamper (true story, by the way) is wasted time and energy. No one should be a doormat in any relationship, but when a petty conflict arises, get over it by laughing or talking about it. It is all too tempting to telenovela-ize my supposed heartache over hubby forcing me to drink that orange juice in the morning even when I’m not used to it, but I try not to. After all, why should I let the drama of the situation drag or dampen our day and our relationship?

How we deal with the minor issues will ultimately prep us for the bigger, and perhaps mightier evils to conquer in a marriage. Learning to choose our battle gives us a better game plan for tackling challenges together, one at a time.

Abby blogs at and spews occasional nonsense on She says half of the time she’s gone, but she doesn’t know where.

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