There are things I hate about myself. On really bad days, I berate myself for these flaws. I angst over how my life could be so much better if I didn’t have any of those faults, any of those weaknesses.
I dislike being weak.
This is what I thought: Weakness is an admission that you can’t hack it. It is a manifestation of how low you understand a situation, of how you’re not quite THERE yet. Weakness is for wimps. That’s how I scold myself when I have really low self-esteem. The inner scolding was triggered either by a bad meeting, a quarrel, or just plain dissatisfaction with whatever situation I’m in.
But weakness is also human. I realize that I’m not perfect, even if I’m a perfectionist. I realize that there’s a bigger purpose and plan in the works, no matter how much I plan out my days, my weeks, the months ahead.
The weakest of weaknesses, I have come to experience, is when you don’t want to give in to weakness. It’s that wanting to be super strong and have super solid a foundation, but deep in your heart, you know it’s not strong or solid enough just yet.
That’s why the biggest strength is in embracing your faults.
Embrace Your Faults: Acknowledging Weaknesses
I’m a procrastinator. The folded laundry is still right outside our closet door, waiting to be tucked in neatly in shelves.
I’m a bad spender. I believe I can manage our finances better.
I like working alone too much. Delegating is a task I’ve slowly been warming up to, but it took a long time before I could trust others or rely on others to help me create better work.
Acknowledging my weaknesses and embracing them is one of the life transitions that have been most enlightening to me. I’ve been learning that once you pay attention to your faults and learn to embrace them, learn to use these as bricks for creating a more solid foundation of YOU, that you can actually live day to day with a life full of love.
No berating of self, just telling yourself that “Hey, you tried your hardest. We’ll try again.”
To embrace your faults doesn’t mean accepting your faults for what they are and not doing anything about them. To embrace your faults is not a passive task, it’s a highly active one. It’s also highly difficult, but very much worth it. It’s hard because you have to strip yourself of pride. But once the pride has been surrendered, you’re left with nothing but the possibility to transition into something, SOMEONE, more full of light, more full of love.
There are still things I hate about myself. I still have my bad days of going “Why God?! Why!?” But the slump doesn’t last as long, the stomping on my own self-esteem happens less frequently. I’m not a perfect wife, mother, colleague, daughter, Catholic, sister, employer. But I have acknowledged what my weaknesses are and am trying to learn from them slowly, gradually, day by day. I am a work in progress. We are all works in progress.
I thought being weak kept me from making life better. What I’ve learned so far is embracing my faults, embracing the imperfect is actually helping me live a more love-filled life.
So here’s to our cracks, our bumps, our pimples, our humps.
Here’s to the barriers that get in our way, the unwanted pit stops in our everyday. Embrace your faults, and be inspired.
Embrace the imperfect, and live a love-filled life.